A woman is practicing driving in the countryside. The instructor, her husband, is in a terrible mood because of work-related stress. He keeps yelling at her inapt navigation, the erratic speeds, and the jerky brakes. The woman becomes increasingly nervous and shaky with his constant badgering. Eventually, her car swerves off the road, lands into a deep muddy ditch with a thud, and is stuck. Nothing happens to the woman, but the impact ends up spraining the man’s knee. He asks his wife to go and seek help. But the woman is furious at him and refuses to get out off the car. Resigned, the man goes limping into the countryside searching for assistance. He had learnt his lesson. He regretted his insensitivity towards his wife.

Often, we bring our work stress home, and vent out frustrations on our spouse. This is particularly rampant in Indian households where the homemaker might have sacrificed her career, only to feel worthless every time her dignity is compromised by her partner’s outbursts of frustration. Ironical. Sometimes we work so hard to improve our family’s lifestyle that we forget that there is more to quality than monetary comforts!

The man limps to a nearby farm, and approaches an old farmer for help. The farmer replies, “Tufaan can get your car out of that ditch,” pointing to an old mule who can barely manage to stand. The man figures he has nothing to lose, and limps back with the farmer and the mule. The farmer hitches the mule to the car and shouts, “Pull, Ajay! Pull, Vijay! Pull, Chetak! Pull, Tufaan!” And the mule pulls the car from the ditch with very little effort. The man is amazed. He thanks the farmer, “Why did you call out all those other names before you called Tufaan?” The farmer grins, “Old Tufaan is blind. As long as he believes he is part of a team, he doesn’t mind pulling.” This time, the observant wife learns her lesson, she regrets not assisting her injured husband.

Everyday when our spouse leaves us to go to the office, we might not realize that the world is not as protective as the home ecosystem. Often, to shield their loved ones, the bread earners might not be sharing their stresses even when they are utterly lonesome and demoralized. Sure, we may not be able to sort out their work troubles. But we can surely give our working partners a feeling that they are not alone, that their struggles are worth it, so that they can pull their load effortlessly.

When our counterparts are going through an unsteady driving/walking phase in their lives, let’s offer our shoulders to lean on. Sure, it’s easier said than done. But then, whoever said that life-long commitments are easy?

Sensitive, Adapted, Team, Style


  1. A good read, all the above things are damn true and its really important to provide an equal imporatnce to both of our areas.

  2. Keep inspiring Arun.. 🙂

  3. Exactly Arun!!! As said, Lean on me is easy to say but difficult to practice, even more difficult when both are bread earners. Still we try to ignore and be supportive to our better halves.

  4. I have this habit of becoming mad at my loved ones when I am stressed due to something else. This isn’t good at all, and I hate this about myself. Over the 30 years of my life, I have learnt how to immediately realise my mistake, and say sorry. Later the said, more the damage done. At the end of the day, these are the people who are going to be attending your funeral, so care for them, always.

  5. Impressive writing style.

  6. Wonderful write-up Arun!

  7. The inspiration of the story is on the top of awesome, the way you have written is OPTIMAL.
    Day by day I am becoming a deep fan of your writings.

  8. The example presented with a story line and a very common scene perfectly highlights the daily condition of an Indian family person 🙂 I think simple stories inspire & appeal a lot because they are the most ignored ones and learning a lesson from simple (common) facts is much much easier. Visionary people often learn from simple things and need not wait for a disaster to make them learn. In other way, quick learners definitely have broad vision having mastered the simple things first. 🙂

  9. so beautifully explained !

  10. so beautifully explained !

  11. Wish our minds were structured to allow a boxed approach, to help separate out work and personal emotions. And it would be nice if we could just live in the present moment without the baggage of the emotions that affect us. I guess it requires a constant conscious effort and a perpetual respect towards those in our company at the moment. Thanks for sharing a simple anecdote and the valuable interpretation.

  12. Truly inspiring…

  13. Very true, fact and written in simple words. Sometimes we do forget these simple things.

  14. Very well written article Arun.. Especially the last line whoever said that life-long commitments are easy? It is important to understand, support, respect each other and show you care.. just by asking a small question like how was your day..
    Doing small small things do make a difference and give us an assurance that we can lean on them..
    Thanks for writing this article.. 🙂

  15. The best one. Always waiting to read your blogs. Thank you!! ☺

  16. How true! To co-exist in a happy home, we all need to pitch in, adjust and empathize. This article very aptly does so.

  17. Excellent story.
    Definitely impressive…

  18. Well said Arun!! Enjoyed the read!!!

  19. love to read your blogs. simply Awesome

  20. Inspiring story with deep message for each one of us. Thanks Arun !!!

  21. well written and a inspiring message .
    Thank you Arun Sir

  22. Wonderful story. Teaches a lot to be implemented by me in real life scenarios.
    Thank you Sir

  23. Very inspiring and good story.
    Thank you Sir 🙂

  24. Even Blind faith do work! feel of being team(even if team of two) is great thing in itself to make lot of things easy nicely explained. Thanks for message Arun sir.

  25. Very good & Inspiring Post

  26. Beautiful! especially the 2nd para.

  27. Well perceived and thoughtfully expressed

  28. What a beautiful and Powerful title it is! so much meaning expressed in just three words.

    I believe Communication goes long way in any relationship.

    Loved the example of teamwork. Everyone likes to be a part of team and has that sense of belonging.

    A very good read. Thank you Sir for sharing.

  29. Surely Team Work is Most Important No Matter its Corporate or Personal Life

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LEAN ON ME - Arun Nathani Blog